Great remarks, Stephen. I especially loved this:

I think we feel pressure to pretend like we’re too spiritually solid to mourn.

This has been my experience. When my son was born with Down syndrome, I was ashamed of my grief, which made it much much worse. The pressure came from within as well as without.

This essay, however, gives us permission to mourn. There has to be mourning in the world, otherwise, how can we fulfill our baptismal covenant to mourn with those who mourn?

Good for Segullah for getting this out to the world. And good for Kerry Spencer for having the spiritual maturity to not only mourn, but but to present it so poignantly.

When I led pregnancy loss groups this was one of the things I gained, varying perspectives and beliefs. You are very right intepretations, experiences are unique. I think even when we accept our own truth we have to careful of the extent which we apply it. While in the midst of grief I was frustrated by the recalcitrance of people in their positions, their defense of one blanket answer. Especially those who viewed from an “inexperienced” lens.

I like how you put this.

If you haven’t already, les (and others), read this post: http://segullah.org/cjane-speaks/the-hourglass-theory/

Time has helped me evolve in my beliefs, I don’t find they are static. I think that is the reason there is no clear doctrine-there isn’t necessarily one point or one outcome for every loss, I do think it is different in different cases because many women have various revelations or feelings by the spirit. My leanings are just sooner rather than later.

Justine- your word of “permanence” is a good choice. That fits with my feelings. I too have send it at the end of life.

I believe in that sort of “limbo” (to clarify my intention in my earlier post) but not a sort of conceptulaization of it as quasi life where an embryo is somehow viewed as something other than human.